Sorry, this is a little late. Week 12 was fine. It was the start of week 13 that got to me. But first, week 12. Hmmm, the only thing I really remember is its fun to have weigh in day the day after the stomach flu. But even then, I knew it would be too good to be true. :p Once I got back on a regular eating schedule I went up, but just a little bit so its ok.
So the drama.... I still continue to have a love hate relationship with WW website. Last Thursday I decided to post on the message boards. I really REALLY want to loose 10 pounds within the next 3 weeks. I'm so close to be under 200 and I want that to happen SOON. So I posted that and got told to eat well and bump up my exercise. Ok, I can do that.
Then I got reading through other people post and I started to notice something. I am the ONLY person who doesn't use their weekly points and also the ONLY person that doesn't use their daily points. I have 33 points, and during the week days (aka, work days) I use like 20 of points. I didn't think it was a big deal. So I posted and asked "Do you really need to use all your daily points?" I also gave a brief description of how I do eat on work days. Breakfast: Smoothie Lunch: Lettuce & Carrots Dinner: Cereal. What a blood bath! I was in tears. EVERYONE thought I was insane. EVERYONE questioned my judgement and if I'm getting enough nutrients. And just about all of them were mean about it. Seriously, 40 comments in one lady said "hey guys, be nice or you'll scare her away."
She was right. They did. At that point I was chatting with my cousin in near tears. She struggled with anorexia and bulimia when she was younger, so I felt like I could better trust her opinion. In a much nicer way, she expressed some of the same concerns. Where do I get my protein? I then had to admit how dumb I am, I don't know what is rich in protein.That is why I eat a FRUIT smoothie for breakfast (with spinach), a VEGETABLE salad for lunch and cereal with MILK for dinner. No, I don't feel like I'm tired all day. No, I don't think I'm missing anything important. No, I don't feel like I'm starving between meals. But YES, I'm seeing the results I want.
She encouraged me to add some meat or cheese to my lunch. And maybe not eat cereal every night. On the message board, they kept chewing me out telling me that its just as hard/easy to cook for one as it is for several people. But I disagree. I do NOT like to cook for myself. It reminds me I'm cooking for just my self. I cook when Josh is home so he can have a decent meal. I'm perfectly fine with cereal. Shoot, that is when I have the hardest time with portion control.
But I'm still really struggling with this. I've been on this diet just over 2 months and I've already lost 26 pounds. I'm not going to complain about that. I don't want to change things. I started eating this way because I was stuck at 223, and I was sick of seeing that number on my scale day after day. I don't think I'm melting off the pounds, but I don't want to go back to slowly loosing just ONE pound every FEW weeks.
That night I was so guilt ridden I ate and entire box of mac n cheese. Then I felt so guilty about it. Apparently I still can eat when depressed. I want to listen to my friend because I do value her opinion. But then I think about all those meanies and I want to tell them they are just jealous and eat even less.
I did buy some sandwich fixing and I've eaten that a few nights instead. But I think I could get bored with sandwiches pretty quick. So I guess for now, the only thing I'm willing to change is I'm going to take have a few slices of cheese with my lunch and maybe I'll throw in a few more veggies like bell peppers or something. And I'll try to eat sandwiches for dinner instead of cereal. But I already know, that if I don't keep seeing these results, I'll just go back to what I was doing.
Which brings up a whole different issue. Those meanies kept telling me to quit dieting and just change my lifestyle. Apparently MY definition of diet is different then theirs. To me, a lifestyle change, at my current weight, would have meant, eating better just to not gain more weight. BUT, I want to loose a lot of weight so I DIET. I choose WW because I knew they would guide me along the way so I could make the lifestyle changes I will need so my diet works long time and I won't ever have to diet again. But NO, according to them a DIET is a quick fix and will never work.
I don't believe that. I am committed. I guess that can't see that online, but in my heart, I am committed.
Well, that is pretty much the update on Week 13 too, but I'll check again at the end of the week to finish up on week 13. This holiday weekend probably set me back so I'm going to work extra hard the next few days.
Monday, May 30, 2011
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
That shirt I didn't buy? Just ordered it online. I'm a little nervous because I ordered it in a size smaller then I probably am. But then I will be determined to loose the weight so I can wear it. Or maybe I'll be surprised and it will fit perfectly.
This weekend was hard. And I'm still having a hard time. I want to blow my diet and eat odd things, like Mac N Cheese. But, if I make Mac N Cheese, I'll eat the whole box because I only like it fresh. I think I need to find new safe foods, but I don't dare venture away from what is working for me.
I know I can't do it, but I really REALLY really want to loose 10 pounds in the next 3 weeks. Again, its just a vanity thing. But I really really REALLY want to do it. I want to look really good by then. Whether I do it or not though, I'm definitely going to buy a few new clothes before then. My pants are really starting to sag and I don't like how I look in them. I'll just try to stay to the basics with a few new jeans and a few work pants.
I've worked so hard on this diet, I'm glad I'm making such good progress. I just need to stick with it and swallow down the lettuce I bring for lunch eat day.
This weekend was hard. And I'm still having a hard time. I want to blow my diet and eat odd things, like Mac N Cheese. But, if I make Mac N Cheese, I'll eat the whole box because I only like it fresh. I think I need to find new safe foods, but I don't dare venture away from what is working for me.
I know I can't do it, but I really REALLY really want to loose 10 pounds in the next 3 weeks. Again, its just a vanity thing. But I really really REALLY want to do it. I want to look really good by then. Whether I do it or not though, I'm definitely going to buy a few new clothes before then. My pants are really starting to sag and I don't like how I look in them. I'll just try to stay to the basics with a few new jeans and a few work pants.
I've worked so hard on this diet, I'm glad I'm making such good progress. I just need to stick with it and swallow down the lettuce I bring for lunch eat day.
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Week 11
Another awesome week. Some days I don't even feel like I'm a "diet" anymore, I've just learned to eat healthier. Right now, this diet doesn't feel tough, it feels do-able. And even exercise is becoming second nature. I think I've exercised every day for about 6 weeks now. Some days its just a quick 15 mins on my exercise bike, but other days its an hour on the exercise bike and then 30 more minutes of Wii Fit Plus. On days I don't exercise, I feel cruddy.
So the big news, I'm down 26 pounds! Wahoo! I didn't expect to do that well this week, but having the stomach flu helped. Although yuck, I don't want to make that a regular part of my diet. 26 pounds also marks that I have lost 10% of my starting weight. That feels HUGE to me.
The other exciting thing is I'm down almost 2 pant sizes. I went shopping last weekend. I didn't buy much, but I still tried on pants. One size down was too big, but the next size down was a bit tight. I could get the button and zipper done up, but they were pretty uncomfortable. I only bought a shirt and then a couple of dresses. I think I'll try to get down to this next size and then maybe one more before I buy some new clothes. Some of my pants are pretty baggy, but I'm trying hard to not go on a wild shopping spree each time I loose a size. :p That is very hard for me to do. But I did buy a belt. It was a size too big, but it was the only one I liked, so I'll just punch holes in it myself.
I was so proud of myself while shopping. I've looked at a shirt a few times, but never bought it. Then once I get home, I wished I had bought it. When I saw it this weekend, I decided I was going to buy it this time. They only had 3 left, and they were all in the size I just grew out of. I tried it on (and still loved it), but I could tell it was a little big. I backed it around the store the whole time I was there. But at check out, I talked myself out of it. It doesn't make since to buy clothes in the size I just grew out of. There will be other cute shirts in other sizes. I asked if they had it in a smaller size, but they didn't. Gosh darn it, I really liked that shirt. Oh well.
I did learn that they say about 10 pounds is a pants size, so that makes sense. When I tried on the pants I was down about 22 pounds, so 2 sizes. So if that is correct for all of my diet, I hope to loose like 7 pant sizes. Wow, I still have a lot of work to do.
I have done better on tracking my eating and exercise, but I remember why I started to slack. Don't get me wrong, I love the Weight Watchers program, it has helped me so much. But, I HATE the website. I swear, half the time it doesn't work. I'll plug my info in and then hit save, but it doesn't ever save. If its going to work, it will save within 5 seconds. If its still trying after that, its not going to work. Sometimes I can log in and try again and it will work fine, but other times it still won't work. Grr. I just added all my info since Monday because up until now, each time I tried, it wouldn't save.
Sometimes I feel like I can't see a change. I look down and can still see my stomach sticking out. But I remind myself that my clothes are looser and the scale keeps going down, so I must be loosing weight. I just can't see it. I'm starting to wish I had done a before picture, but I HATE those. When you see before pictures, they are all frumpy. No make up, sometimes not nicely done hair, and frumpy clothes. Then 50-100 pounds later, they look amazing! Of course they do, they've lost weight. But I feel likes its wrong, because in the after picture, their hair is styled, they have on makeup and fabulous clothes. I know I'm fat. I know I'm overweight. But that doesn't make me ugly and frumpy. I try to look my best every day. I am pretty now and I will be just as pretty 50 pounds later.
So the big news, I'm down 26 pounds! Wahoo! I didn't expect to do that well this week, but having the stomach flu helped. Although yuck, I don't want to make that a regular part of my diet. 26 pounds also marks that I have lost 10% of my starting weight. That feels HUGE to me.
The other exciting thing is I'm down almost 2 pant sizes. I went shopping last weekend. I didn't buy much, but I still tried on pants. One size down was too big, but the next size down was a bit tight. I could get the button and zipper done up, but they were pretty uncomfortable. I only bought a shirt and then a couple of dresses. I think I'll try to get down to this next size and then maybe one more before I buy some new clothes. Some of my pants are pretty baggy, but I'm trying hard to not go on a wild shopping spree each time I loose a size. :p That is very hard for me to do. But I did buy a belt. It was a size too big, but it was the only one I liked, so I'll just punch holes in it myself.
I was so proud of myself while shopping. I've looked at a shirt a few times, but never bought it. Then once I get home, I wished I had bought it. When I saw it this weekend, I decided I was going to buy it this time. They only had 3 left, and they were all in the size I just grew out of. I tried it on (and still loved it), but I could tell it was a little big. I backed it around the store the whole time I was there. But at check out, I talked myself out of it. It doesn't make since to buy clothes in the size I just grew out of. There will be other cute shirts in other sizes. I asked if they had it in a smaller size, but they didn't. Gosh darn it, I really liked that shirt. Oh well.
I did learn that they say about 10 pounds is a pants size, so that makes sense. When I tried on the pants I was down about 22 pounds, so 2 sizes. So if that is correct for all of my diet, I hope to loose like 7 pant sizes. Wow, I still have a lot of work to do.
I have done better on tracking my eating and exercise, but I remember why I started to slack. Don't get me wrong, I love the Weight Watchers program, it has helped me so much. But, I HATE the website. I swear, half the time it doesn't work. I'll plug my info in and then hit save, but it doesn't ever save. If its going to work, it will save within 5 seconds. If its still trying after that, its not going to work. Sometimes I can log in and try again and it will work fine, but other times it still won't work. Grr. I just added all my info since Monday because up until now, each time I tried, it wouldn't save.
Sometimes I feel like I can't see a change. I look down and can still see my stomach sticking out. But I remind myself that my clothes are looser and the scale keeps going down, so I must be loosing weight. I just can't see it. I'm starting to wish I had done a before picture, but I HATE those. When you see before pictures, they are all frumpy. No make up, sometimes not nicely done hair, and frumpy clothes. Then 50-100 pounds later, they look amazing! Of course they do, they've lost weight. But I feel likes its wrong, because in the after picture, their hair is styled, they have on makeup and fabulous clothes. I know I'm fat. I know I'm overweight. But that doesn't make me ugly and frumpy. I try to look my best every day. I am pretty now and I will be just as pretty 50 pounds later.
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Week 10
This wasn't my best week, but it was also far from a bad week, but I'm down a little bit more, so overall, I guess that means it was a good week. :)
I haven't tracked my food or activity since the end of April. So that is my goal this week, to track everything, everyday.
With Josh working full time, I'm still trying to figure out a new exercise schedule. For the most part, I'm riding my exercise bike when I get home from work. My bike needs a little more work and then I can ride it outside, when the winds not blowing. Which actually, I think we are hopefully FINALLY out of the windy season. I hope. My other goal this week is to buy a belt. I don't care for belts, but I need to do something and its that or new pants. I would LOVE new clothes, but I'm trying to resist until later in the diet. I can't afford to buy new clothes each time I drop a size. But I am going to have FUN shopping when I'm down to where I want to be.
Not much to report in the eating department. Josh is back to work and I don't like cooking for just myself. So most days its lettuce for lunch (because really, that's the only part of a salad I like), with sometimes carrot sticks. Then for dinner I have cereal. I'm still having smoothies for breakfast most days. I'm glad I'm not tired of them yet.
Changing my weigh in day to Thursday has helped so much. I'm sure once I start tracking again, I'll learn that I blow most of my weekly points during the weekend, but then since I eat so carefully during the week, it doesn't put me in a panic the day before weigh in.
Now I'm off to eat some watermelon. Its like a taste of summer. :)
I haven't tracked my food or activity since the end of April. So that is my goal this week, to track everything, everyday.
With Josh working full time, I'm still trying to figure out a new exercise schedule. For the most part, I'm riding my exercise bike when I get home from work. My bike needs a little more work and then I can ride it outside, when the winds not blowing. Which actually, I think we are hopefully FINALLY out of the windy season. I hope. My other goal this week is to buy a belt. I don't care for belts, but I need to do something and its that or new pants. I would LOVE new clothes, but I'm trying to resist until later in the diet. I can't afford to buy new clothes each time I drop a size. But I am going to have FUN shopping when I'm down to where I want to be.
Not much to report in the eating department. Josh is back to work and I don't like cooking for just myself. So most days its lettuce for lunch (because really, that's the only part of a salad I like), with sometimes carrot sticks. Then for dinner I have cereal. I'm still having smoothies for breakfast most days. I'm glad I'm not tired of them yet.
Changing my weigh in day to Thursday has helped so much. I'm sure once I start tracking again, I'll learn that I blow most of my weekly points during the weekend, but then since I eat so carefully during the week, it doesn't put me in a panic the day before weigh in.
Now I'm off to eat some watermelon. Its like a taste of summer. :)
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Week 9
Wow, its hard to believe I've been on a diet for 2 months. I'm so proud of myself. I've wanted to diet for years and never thought I had what it takes, but now it looks like I do.
I'm holding steady at 20 pounds lost right now. But I'm excited about that because my period is here and last month I gained weight so I'm happy to be the same. The cravings have been bad lately, but I've been better at ignoring them.
I'm not doing well at tracking my stuff on Weight Watchers. I really need to recommit to that! I know I'm making healthy choices, but I really have no idea how many points I'm eating each day.
I'm really getting into exercise (another thing I'd never thought I'd get good at). Each day we get a 30 minutes lunch break, but we also get two 15 mins breaks. I've made myself go walk around the yard at work each break. The first few days were HARD. I thought riding my stationary bike would be enough to get me in shape, but I learned I am still out of shape. I walked with a few gals and one of them walks FAST and we walk to stay caught up to her. But I like the fast because then we have enough time to go around the yard and then circle the warehouse once more. One break, I ended up walking alone and at the end I made sure to get my arms swinging so it would work me out even more.
I'm not letting that be my only exercise though. I also try to get on my bike each day and then last night I even did my Wii fit for a while too. I feel better on days I exercise and I've come to hate it when I miss days. Who knew!
Josh is now back to work full time, which means nights alone for me. I'm trying to find the motivation to cook for one, but do it healthy.(aka, not resort to Mac n cheese, because I know I will eat the entire box.) So far, I've just had cereal for dinner. :p I'm trying to find a new pattern so I don't have to get up so early to exercise. Last night I rode my bike for 45 mins (and watched Desperate Housewives), then I did the Wii fit for about another 40 mins. So then it was almost 8 before I started to think about dinner. Hence the cereal. But if I don't cook, then I don't have left overs for lunch the next day. I'm starting to get bored with lettuce, I need to figure something out.
Keep it up me, I'm so proud of you. ;)
I'm holding steady at 20 pounds lost right now. But I'm excited about that because my period is here and last month I gained weight so I'm happy to be the same. The cravings have been bad lately, but I've been better at ignoring them.
I'm not doing well at tracking my stuff on Weight Watchers. I really need to recommit to that! I know I'm making healthy choices, but I really have no idea how many points I'm eating each day.
I'm really getting into exercise (another thing I'd never thought I'd get good at). Each day we get a 30 minutes lunch break, but we also get two 15 mins breaks. I've made myself go walk around the yard at work each break. The first few days were HARD. I thought riding my stationary bike would be enough to get me in shape, but I learned I am still out of shape. I walked with a few gals and one of them walks FAST and we walk to stay caught up to her. But I like the fast because then we have enough time to go around the yard and then circle the warehouse once more. One break, I ended up walking alone and at the end I made sure to get my arms swinging so it would work me out even more.
I'm not letting that be my only exercise though. I also try to get on my bike each day and then last night I even did my Wii fit for a while too. I feel better on days I exercise and I've come to hate it when I miss days. Who knew!
Josh is now back to work full time, which means nights alone for me. I'm trying to find the motivation to cook for one, but do it healthy.(aka, not resort to Mac n cheese, because I know I will eat the entire box.) So far, I've just had cereal for dinner. :p I'm trying to find a new pattern so I don't have to get up so early to exercise. Last night I rode my bike for 45 mins (and watched Desperate Housewives), then I did the Wii fit for about another 40 mins. So then it was almost 8 before I started to think about dinner. Hence the cereal. But if I don't cook, then I don't have left overs for lunch the next day. I'm starting to get bored with lettuce, I need to figure something out.
Keep it up me, I'm so proud of you. ;)
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