Week 74

I've realized my grammar can be scattered in my post. I apologize and will try to do better. I try to log in often so I can keep a more accurate track of my eating. But sometimes that leads to me writing in present tense. Then went I get behind and play catch up, I fall to past tense. I will work on this so it reads more smoothly.
Thursday - I really thought about sleeping in today. I was up late last night. But I reminded myself I would only gain 30 mins of sleep and decided to just get up and go to Curves. Bonus, now I can go play with the nephews before book club tonight. I love those boys.

Breakfast was coffee and pop tarts. Lunch was a protein drink. Snack was a root beer float. Dinner was a potato bar at my mom's book club with home made ice cream for dessert. If I had remembered the ice cream part, I would have skipped the root beer floats at work. Oh well, it made for a fun day of splurging. Oh, and the boys were at their dads, so I didn't get to see them. But it was still worth going to Curves in the morning so my evening could be relaxing.

Friday - Breakfast was a bowl of life cereal and a glass of milk. I was having a hard time dragging myself to Curves, but I knew we needed groceries, so I finally went. About half way through,. I started to feel sick. I think I'm getting the stomach flu that has been going around. Grr. So no lunch, just a 7up, but I haven't even drank much of it. I did feel a little bit better at dinner time, so I had some stir fry.

Saturday - Josh ran his first 5K today. I'm so proud of him. My foot still bothers me from time to time, so I decided to not run with him. Breakfast was coffee and oatmeal. Lunch was a late bbq at Barb's house. I had chips, pulled pork sandwich, lots of grapes and watermelon. Along with grandma Vonne's carrot cake. I hate carrot cake, unless she makes it, then I LOVE it. Then about 5 pm, Barb brought out some kind of carmely goodness and I ate it. By the time we got home, it was late and I didn't feel like dinner. I did lots of walking today while at the park with Josh and again while out checking on the horses.

Sunday - Breakfast was coffee and about half an omelet. Then I got sick again and I was sick ALL DAY. I tried sipping on some ginger ale, but that didn't help. When Josh had dinner, I took 2 bites of my chicken taco and thought it was coming backup. So instead of eating, I went to bed.

Monday - Finally feeling better today! And starving, since I haven't eaten since breakfast yesterday. I decide to not get up early for Curves, but hopefully I'll make it after work. Breakfast today was yogurt with granola and coffee. Lunch was a protein drink. Dinner was asparagus at my mom's, but I didn't like the sauce on her pork chops, so I went home and had a small dish of stir fry. Exercise today was two 15 min. walks and Curves.

I am thinking about trying to cut all sugar out of my diet and Josh is willing to try with me. I'm feeling overwhelmed, but I just need to remind myself I can do anything I put my mind to. I have amazed myself over the last year and a half. So I'm going to do some research into it and see what I can figure out and do.

Tuesday - Since I went to Curves last night, I think I might just go at night all week. I don't want to go at night and then go again 12 hours later. But I already miss the morning routine. So I'll go to Curves tonight, but then think about getting up in the morning. I like having my evenings free.

I swear I'm not sick that often, but since keeping a daily journal, I feel like I always am. This morning I woke up with a tooth ache. When I get those, I can usually take some ibuprofen and it goes away. But today, all it did was get worse. And then worse. So much so, that I called my dentist, which I have never done before. Thankfully, he got me in today. He couldn't see much on the x-ray, so to hopefully bypass a root canal, he put me on some drugs to hopefully clear it up. Here's hoping!

Because of said tooth ache, I haven't eaten much. I had coffee and a banana for breakfast, and even that banana hurt my tooth. My appt. was at 1:10, so I thought about skipping lunch until after my appt., but around 11:30, I ate another banana and some nuts because I was feeling shaky. After the dentist, I went to Maverick and got a salad. I've seen a few people at work eat them and they look delish! And huge! I ate about 1/3 of it and will eat the rest tomorrow. It was only $4.99 and it comes with a free bottle of water, so I think I have stumbled onto a great idea. That makes it only like $2.50 a day! I also let the pain get the better of me and splurged on a donut. But when someone bought ice cream later, I didn't have any since I already had the donut. Dinner was 2 small chicken tacos.

Exercise today was one 15 min. walk and Curves. I did my weekly weigh in last night and was down 3 pounds since last week! I finally got to pull some slips off of the lady on the wall! I was pretty excited. I also figured it up. In March, April, May and June, I averaged going to Curves about 6 times each month. Not very good numbers. :( In July, I went 20 times! I'm so proud of myself. My month weigh in is about a week away; I can't wait. I have finally committed to Curves and I think it will show.

Wednesday - The drugs the dentist put me on gave me some insomnia last night. I had already decided to get up early and go to Curves because I miss going in the morning so much. (Who knew I would come to love that so much?!) I tossed and turned all night and I think my tooth finally quit hurting around midnight. I woke up 5 minutes before my alarm and decided to get up and get back to the morning routine. It was a little hard because I was just there 12 hours previous, but it felt so good to do it in the morning.

Breakfast was coffee, half a protein drink and a banana. Lunch was the rest of the salad from yesterday. I was a little worried it might get soggy, but it didn't! I thought about keeping some croutons and craisins at work to add, but now I need to figure that into my "no sugar" plan.

Today, I have really struggled with the thought of eating out. It terrifies me. I spend all day thinking the best of intentions, but I get to the order menu and loose all reason. It bothers me so much, that I have thought of adopting a policy of no more eating out, but then there goes the rare date nights I get to enjoy.

Today, this struggle has been worse. So much so, I thought about faking an excuse so I didn't have to eat out with a friend. But I decided to push through it. I am going to go out and eat and order something decent. No fries, no onion rings, no shakes, nothing deep fried. I think I'll even take my stuff off the bun if it comes with one. I can do this for me because I'm worth it. I just need to take a minute to study out the menu and remember that nothing taste as good as skinny feels. My diet has done so well today, I'm finally seeing results again. I am not going to screw this up over one meal while eating out.

The last two paragraphs were written before dinner. Following, is my less then ideal experience.

With some help from H, she talked me into trying to eat out. So I went to Arbys.com and read through the menu and finally settled on a chicken sandwich. I don't eat there often, but I remembered you could get either a deep fried, crispy chicken or a grilled chicken. So I decided I would get the grilled chicken and skip all sides, like fries. I beat my friend there by a few minutes, so while waiting, I asked for nutrition info and looked it over and decided to stick with that option. I had also decided to eat just the chicken, not the bun. I also ordered a bottle of water.

Apparently, they don't do grilled chicken anymore. Its either deep fried, crispy chicken or sliced sandwich meat chicken. My sandwich was a bun, sliced chicken, tomatoes (which I HATE), sauce (which I HATE) and lettuce. So basically, if I followed my "well thought out plan", all I could eat was the sliced chicken. I was ready to cry. I thought for a minute about eating the sandwich, bun and all. But since I forgot to say no sauce, that didn't sound good. So I wrapped the sandwich up to take home to Sage and went back up front and ordered a salad. I only ate half because it was not a very good salad. Maverick makes way better salads! Since the meal felt like such a disaster, I decided to add a 5 calorie flavoring to my water, even though H thinks I should avoid fake sugar too.

It was so hard to stay strong when I hated my food. I knew I could order something yummy, like jalapeno bites, but I have seen results this week! I was not going to blow it all on one meal, especially since the following morning was my official weigh in. At craft group, we had brownies and orange Julius. I skipped the brownies, but did have half a cup of orange Julius to wash down the yucky dinner.

I hate to admit just how distraught I was last night. I was falling back to my "unhealthy" relationship with food where I thought it would be better to skip eating all together.

Sticking very strictly to the salad last night (especially if you consider that is what I had for lunch too)  paid off. I saw 178 on the scale this morning! I haven't seen that number in MONTHS, and even then, I only saw it for a very short time.

When I got to Curves this morning, I went in to put on my work shoes and saw their poster "Will Power Vs. Curly Fries". I am so proud of myself of letting my will power win last night.  Now, to just hold onto that will power as I go through this month. With helping cater a few events and a trip planned, it will be hard, but I can do this!